Thinking about Santa

Because it's Christmastime, Ross and I have been talking about Santa Claus and what we would like to do with the kids we will hopefully have at some point. Ross is very opposed to the idea of teaching our kids to believe in Santa because he doesn't like the idea of lying to one's children. I don't care so much about that (realizing that parents and caretakers deceive children in small ways all the time) but I am uncomfortable with the creepiness of Santa "watching" behavior (the Elf on the Shelf, for instance, just creeps me out). Rather than saying Santa was watching, my mom would just tell us that if we didn't behave at Christmastime, she would take our presents back to the store. It's the same threat without the perverseness of an invisible, omnipresent judge. (I wouldn't want my kids to develop that concept of God, so why would I encourage that concept of Santa?)

Most of the buzz about not observing any Santa Claus tradition seems to be from conservative Christians who disagree with secular observations of Christmas, but that doesn't factor in for us. I love a lot of secular aspects of Christmas (lights, trees, decorating, gift giving, that it's observed in December...) and have no problem incorporating them into what is still a religious holiday.

I grew up with Santa bringing candy and small gifts to fill my stocking. All the presents under the tree were from their actual giver (usually parents). As a kid I sometimes wondered why Santa brought other kids things like bikes and dolls but they got almost nothing from their parents. I never really wanted Santa to bring that stuff since my parents fulfilled a lot of my wishes (and received the exclamations of thanks on Christmas morning!), and we received a moderate amount of gifts. I realize that it's tradition for some families to give tons of gifts from Santa, but to me it seems really over the top.

I remember the conversation I had with my mom when I realized that Santa (and the Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy) was not real. She explained that Santa was not an actual being, but a spirit of anonymous giving and a way to make the world a little more magical. I was initially unsatisfied with that answer, but came to love it pretty quickly. (I also was still perfectly happy to receive a stocking full of candy and little gifts!)

I wonder, though, how to go about not teaching belief in Santa in a culture where small children will certainly see depictions of Santa and be asked about their interactions with Santa. How do you keep a child from feeling disappointed about their parents rather than Santa filling their stocking, or even worse, from developing a belief in Santa anyway and thinking that us rather than Santa filling their stockings is a reflection of their inherent badness (since Santa allegedly doesn't visit bad children)? I'm glad I won't have to figure out how to negotiate this for a while.

Readers, what do you think? Did anyone grow up never believing in Santa? What did your parents teach you, and did you still do stockings from parents? How did you feel about it? Parents, if you aren't doing Santa for your kids, how do you address the cultural pervasiveness of Santa? What do you teach your kids?

Grateful for: IKEA

Okay, so I don't love Ikea in the same way I love my mom or Thanksgiving. But hey, if I'm going to write a bunch of blog entries about things I'm grateful for, I'm going to run out of family members eventually.

Yesterday Ross and I filled up a wall of our bedroom with the Antonius clothes storage system from Ikea. (Or more accurately, I filled the wall since I put the whole thing together.) I've had one set of drawers from that system for several years and I really like it. We've been needing to buy at least one more dresser, and this frees up a dresser or two for upstairs (so I can reign in the fabricsplosion up there).

I was SO EXCITED when I found out an Ikea was opening in Denver. I'd previously only been to one in Michigan, and I think the experience is a lot of fun. I love seeing Scandinavian design, although its clean lines, liberal use of plastic, and compartmentalization are a little too modern for what I actually want in my home. It is visually pleasing, but not cozy.

Walking through the showroom every so often is fun - you get to see lots of creative ways to arrange furniture and utilize space that often goes unused, which is always nice - plus they have some products you can't get elsewhere very easily... like lingonberry juice! And everything has silly Swedish names! Oh, Ikea. So much fun. I am so happy there is one in my city now.

Grateful for: Vinyl

I've been working on a quilting project lately, and since our music player in my sewing room is a record player, I've been listening to records. Mostly a Mannheim Steamroller Christmas album. But it only has 8 songs on it, so when that gets old, I listen to Ross's other records, which include a lot of 1960's and 70's folk.

As far as I know, my mom has never quilted. She is a much more talented seamstress than I am, so she makes things like clothing and silk wall hangings. (I have never successfully made any clothing, my costumes rely heavily on staples and hot glue, and I've been working on the same Christmas wall hanging for like five years.) I make quilts and blankets because they come together quickly and following a pattern is not necessary.

Anyway, as I've been upstairs listening to records and sewing, I've been feeling connected to my mom. I don't think she's ever worked on a quilt while listening to Peter, Paul, and Mary or Simon & Garfunkel on vinyl, but when I do, I appreciate sewing and folk music - and my mother - in a new way.