This has been on my mind

Give thanks for life, the measure of our days
Mortal, we pass through beauty that decays
Yet sing to God our hope, our love, our praise:
Alleluia, alleluia
- Shirley Erena Murray

It's really just that second line I like so much.

I wish I had a photo of bright red trees covered in snow from this week, but I can't find my camera battery charger.

Swine Flu

I'm over swine flu. No, I don't mean I've recovered from it. (Despite being exposed to that and all sorts of other illnesses rather frequently, my immune system is still truckin' along without assault). I mean I'm done dealing with it. Or more specifically, I'm done dealing with people freaking out about it.

I've been working at the doctor's office since the beginning of September -- right when the H1N1/swine flu epidemic hit Colorado full force. As someone who answers phones at a family practice office, I am privileged with hearing the general public freak out about swine flu every day.

Seriously. Every day. Plenty of them ask reasonable questions, but so many of them have common-sense answers. And then there are a few questions that are just dumb. And the worst ones are the questions that start out, "I heard on TV that..."

Oh, I just shudder when I hear somebody start out with that.

Here is my Swine Flu FAQ, including questions both reasonable and unreasonable.

Q: I have a fever, sore throat, fatigue, chills, body aches, and diarrhea. Do I have the swine flu?
A: Probably. According to the medical practitioners here, the health department, and the CDC, you can assume so.

Q: I have the flu. Can I come in and find out if I have swine flu or regular flu?
A: No. The health department won't even test any more samples, and P.S. IT DOESN'T MATTER WHICH FLU YOU HAVE. They both make you feel like crap. They both resolve in about a week. You can get secondary infections on top of either one. They both in rare cases can cause severe complications including death. Knowing which virus you're infected with won't change any of that, and you don't need to know which virus you have to take care of yourself and watch out for complications.

Q: I have a sore throat, fatigue, and body aches, but I don't have a fever or diarrhea. Do you think I have swine flu?
A: You could. You could also have another virus. But let me just use my special fiberoptic-cable-transcending swine flu detector to find out so you can freak out appropriately if the virus you have is H1N1.

Q: I think I have a mild case of the flu. Can I schedule an appointment to come see the doctor?
A: Sure, if you want to give us some money, sap all your energy getting to the doctor's office, expose some people to whatever you do have, and have the doctor tell you to go home and get lots of rest and fluids.

Q: My cousin's stepdaughter has the flu and they think it's swine flu and I am perfectly healthy and don't have any symptoms and I can't come in for an office visit. Will you prescribe me some Tamiflu?
A: Seriously? There's a Tamiflu shortage. Hell no you can't have it if you feel fine and won't even come in for an office visit.

Q: I think I have the flu. Will you prescribe me some antibiotics?
A: Antibiotics won't help with your virus. Dumbass. Do you want your grandchildren to have antibiotics that work?

Q: I feel like I'm getting the flu. Do you have the swine flu vaccine yet?
A: No we don't, and even if we did it wouldn't do you any good because you already have the virus in your system. Don't you understand how vaccinations work?

Q: On TV they said that swine flu is going to kill me and my children, incite riots, and drain all the joy from the world. Should I be stocking up on canned goods? Can I have some Tamiflu?
A: Only if you fill the bottle with explosives and throw it at your television.

Homecomings

I've been experiencing homecomings lately.

Last weekend was Bethel's Fall Fest -- homecoming weekend. And homecoming in another sense, as Ross and I went our separate ways and I stayed in my old mod, with my old modmates (who are all a year younger than me and so were all there, with the exception of one who is studying in Ecuador). I slept my old futon mattress which I've long-term loaned to Meredith. I had coffee with a favorite professor -- really a mentor and friend -- whose office I used to stop by frequently for good conversation. As before, I stood around a bonfire in the woods, had a couple of beers, and talked to the people I already knew. It felt like home.

This weekend, I went to Kansas City. The impetus came from a good friend informing me a few weeks ago that she was planning to go wedding dress shopping and another friend (also in the wedding party) was flying in to visit too. Affordable plane tickets and the desire to see my family convinced me. I stayed at my parents' house, slept in my comfortable bed in my ice-cold room. I visited with my grandpa for a few hours and helped him move plants inside, anticipating a freeze. The house, and the family, has changed since it was really my home. I am comfortable there, but it is not my space any longer.

I went out for drinks with Laura and Lauren and talked about our jobs and long-term relationships, which felt good but reminded us that we're at least two life stages beyond sleepovers in Lauren's basement, which happened almost literally half our lifetimes ago (granted, our lifetimes are not that long yet). I'm grateful for these friendships, for relating despite living in three different cities, having spent four years mostly apart, and not really knowing each other's significant others.

And now I've come home -- really home -- to my apartment in Denver. Ross is here, and Jess and other friends, and all my stuff, and a shower and toilet that I am used to. It is freezing cold like my parents' house and with friends like Bethel, but this is my space.